Saturday, October 27, 2012

Things I Wish Were Real

          According to  one of the top ten things that are trending on twitter these days is the topic "The top ten things I wish were real". It has been climbing the charts since the beginning of the month and now sits at the #8 spot on the chart. I like popular trends just as much as the next person, so I decided to put my two cents in the mix. Of course I am all about being original, so I took the topic and put my own little spin magic on it. I shortened the list to the top three things, and since nobody else was doing it, added the "why".

  •           Perching at the top of my lengthy list would be DRAGONS.

      Now, I know what you are thinking.."Why dragons?" First of all, dragons wouldn't be flying around burning villages and capturing virgins or anything. We would be able to see them in the zoos or maybe in a depressing circus show. Of course they would be like most American pets today and be spayed/neutered, de-clawed, de-fanged, broken spirited, lesser versions of themselves. But wouldn't it be cool? Or what if we domesticated them and had "dragon farms"? We could raise cows, then feed them to the dragons to fatten them up! Imagine how much meat a DRAGON would provide! Dragon steaks on the grill for 4th of July anyone? Mmm, tastes like chicken!

  •                                  Next up, MONEY TREES!
      Yes, Money trees! What would the world as we know it be like with ACTUAL money trees? You would think that life would be easier and that everyone would have one in their front yard, but alas, that wouldn't be the case. We are a greedy society, so I think that some fat cat would come along and corner the money tree seed market. Then Congress would pass regulations on the production, transportation, and sales of these wonderful evergreens. They would probably make it illegal. We would then have people growing them in patches on Government land, or with hydroponics in their attics and garages. People would start smuggling money trees across borders to satisfy the money tree demand, and we would have to start "THE WAR ON MONEY TREES". Come to think of it, I take it back. I'm glad money trees aren't real!

  •                   Lastly, those beloved little green fellows....MARTIANS!
      Say goodbye to the National deficit and every nation's money woes. Could you imagine the FREE TRADE AGREEMENT we could negotiate with a people who have exactly ZERO natural resources? Of course, this also means that they would have nothing to pay us with...They could become the new China, though. Imagine how cheap the workforce would be! Are you ready for MADE ON MARS labels?

*Remember to share this posts with your friends to see what they come up with!

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